Monday, November 21, 2011

Gratitude and Contentment

Gratitude and contentment are kin to one another.

Most of the time they go hand and hand.

Lately I have been flooded with guilt that has morphed into discontentment and in turn has bound up my heart... from thankfulness.

Instead I have been questioning why I have so much when so many have so little...

Why do my children have access to medication, doctors, hospitals....when so many in this world go without?

Why do I not only have a piping hot dinner every night, but one that consists of whatever my palate is desiring that certain day...when people are hungry for any type of food?

When I have the choice of beverage whether it be an expensive wine or a diet cola...and others are choking on dry tongues, longing for clean water to quench their thirst?

And this guilt is kind of a disguise for discontentment that partners with a type of ingratitude that lurks and masks itself as unworthiness or even humility.

But when stripped down and standing unclothed in the light of truth...ingratitude is exposed and has no chance of faking its way into a different appearance.

And the words of Paul breathed by the God of the universe written in the book of Philippians, chapter 4, strike a nerve down deep:

'for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.'

Paul had lived with plenty and he had lived in want.  He understood both sides of the coin.  With and without...

And God has fed me this Word of His tonight and filled me up with enough reminding me to be satisfied in ALL circumstances of my life.  When I have plenty and when I am in dire need of basic necessities.

The guilt has been replaced with a grateful heart that is content with enough.

And I am not encouraging or condoning hoarding material wealth.

What I would like to convey is that God has placed me in this life, this well-fed, soaped and shampooed up hydrated life...

...and so much of the time, lately especially, I have been consumed with this immobilizing guilt that never goes away... even after signing the check that not only feeds those hungry stomachs but also nourishes empty souls with the living bread of life that gives eternal hope.

Tonight I am letting go.  I am going to choose to live in the freedom that I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

And tonight I am asking Him to grant me the gift of contentment as I hand over the guilt and instead thank Him for ALL situations!!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Harmonious Compositions

My husband made a comment about someone the other day.

"That woman has 'Hurried Mother Syndrome', " He says.

And I'm not sure if that really is a condition or not...

It very well could be.  He would know since he has sold prescription drugs for many different disorders the last several years. But I didn't even bother to ask him if he was kidding or being serious.

All I thought was that I certainly hope and pray that I don't have "Hurried Mother Syndrome".

At least not to the extent that people notice (for goodness sake).

But those simple words uttered out of those lips that I know all too well has struck a chord that rings loud.

And the sound of that clashing instrument beats deep within... reminding me that I am, beyond a reasonable doubt, living with this horrible disease.

And the melody most definitely isn't appealing or even the least bit desirable.

Instead the notes are pounded out creating more of an ear-piercing noise. A wretched sound that puts the worst jazz to shame.

And with this in the front of my mind, I wake up to morning chaos, scrambling as usual but with a bit more self-awareness...maybe even a bit of conviction in my tread.

And I find myself hurrying the kids out the door because they have a REALLY hard time staying on task.

But I am so much more aware now of the type of music I want to dance to in my daily routines with the children.

And I was reminded this morning that much of the time, most of the time, I end up hurrying them when I have been the worst culprit by fitting in too much in too little time.

Most of the time, I don't give enough time.

I am playing triplet notes instead of whole notes, trying to fit in more than I have allotted time for, squishing more than one measure can hold.

And my lack of practice all too often results in a frazzled hurried mother pointing a wrong finger at an innocent child.

I rush through the music in front of me.

I bang it out in the wrong key.

I take my eyes and ears off of the music.

But tonight I am so thankful for the light that has been shone brightly on each and every harmonious note laid out in front of me.

This beautiful composition named "Motherhood" stands upright against the dark wooden music stand called life...

And tonight the writing has been clearly written by my divine God who spoke through my better half who didn't even realize what impact he was making as I read what He was saying...

And sometimes the light is dimmed and the notes aren't clear and that is when I just fill in and play by ear...

But many times the writing is clear and flooded with light and my job is to play as written...

And this, my friend, is one of those times....

Friday, November 11, 2011

Five Minute Friday: Unexpected

For only five short, bold, beautiful minutes. Unscripted and unedited. We just writewithout worrying if it’s just right or not.
Won’t you join us?
    1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
    2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
    3. Most importantly: leave a comment for the person who linked up before you – encouraging them in their writing!
OK, are you ready? Give me your best five minutes on:



I am a planner.  I planned each one of my three pregnancies.  I plan our family vacation every year.  I like to know the plan and not be blind-sided however, some of the best times in life are often those that are unanticipated, unplanned and UNEXPECTED.

Whether it be the breath being taken from my lungs as a dramatic sunrise canvases my front window or a simple smile curled on the lips of one of those three cherished beings who call me mama.

It could be an UNEXPECTED win with 22 seconds left in a Pee Wee travel hockey game where 2 amazing goals are scored shorthanded (because of a penalty) and the other team has pulled their goalie making the competition 6 on 4 and two different players break out and score, back to back and we hold them bringing on a  VICTORY!!

Mundane routines sprinkled with UNEXPECTED events often confirm and remind me that this peace that passes all understanding is actively alive and working in all circumstances.

It could be as simple as hearing my girl sing her heart out and taking me somewhere over the rainbow at 6:30 am after she crawled and sprawled her way into my bed taking what little is left of my imagination far above the chimney tops...I totally did not EXPECT to go to the land of Oz so early this morning, but I sure am glad that I did!!

I love these UNEXPECTED moments!!