Joe turns up the stereo and the boys walk on their hands and flip upside down and it sounds like they are going to bust through the ceiling as I wipe off left-over dinner crumbs underneath them all.
The water spills as the music blares as the boys pound and my patience thins all at the same time.
I had asked him to get Ayla ready for bed and had sent the boys up to read, not to do gymnastics.
General Mama storms up the stairs and breaks up the bash yet once again.
And as I turn the music down and make my way down the hall to settle the boys down to bed, my spirits fall down as well.
And not only because I was enforcing my mama-police duties but also because I let the anger creep up and overwhelm and have allowed it to overflow out onto the family yet once again...
And poor Joe was having a moment with the boys, sharing a song special to his heart and a story about a cousin who could walk clear across the driveway on his hands...
And I stomped up all puffed up and chirp in and ruin it...
And the guilt fills and spills thick.
And I turn it over as the words of the song strike a chord in my soul,,,
"All I want for you is to be satisfied"
And that is what I want for my children, for my family, for myself...
To be satisfied with "enough"
"Not to (as the song says) lust for rich mans gold (but to remember that) all you need is in your soul."
And I think about a blog I read a little while back about "Enough" click here
Those words typed and his song sang and Joe's favorite song all resounding loud help me focus on the important...issues of the heart.
And as I settle into bed I refuse to allow myself to be swallowed up by guilt but instead I agree to be saturated in thanks.
Because tonight I am satisfied with "enough".