Monday, October 10, 2011

Anger Management

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed yesterday.  Joe even brought me coffee and breakfast upstairs and I still was crabby.  I was irritated that it was such a beautiful day and Jonah had an away hockey scrimmage late afternoon.  I wanted to go out to a nice apple orchard and enjoy a family day, not be stuck in a freezing ice rink.  Joe's the coach, the one who scheduled the stinking thing and I was irritated.  Not only that we had to freeze on a nice day but also because Jonah and him would miss part of church.  We decided to make a quick trip to a local one anyway and on the way I was still boiling, and bickering with Joe.

Anger was rising up from down deep and spilling out of my mouth.

All of a sudden it left, just as quick and swift as it came.

We ended up having a nice time at the orchard and enjoyed lunch at one of our favorite places nearby.

I decided to skip the hockey game and take Micah and Ayla to the park.

On the way home we stopped for ice-cream.

We sat out on a picnic table and as I was inhaling my pumpkin pie blizzard a cute young couple walk right by us and stand in line.  They seemed happy and smiley and as they gazed our way, Ayla decides to ask me a question directly in their earshot,

"Mama, why were you so angry today?"

"Angry, when was I angry?"

Warm flames of red flash fast on my cheeks as the couple look at one another lips curling into grins.

"You know when you were angry at daddy in the car this morning?"

They turn around, probably embarrassed for me as I fumble for an answer and I secretly wish that I could shrink down and jump into my whipped ice-cream and hide.

And as I mumble something back to appease her and cover up my embarrassment, I realize God is showing me something loud and clear.

Not only that my kids hear and pick up on everything but that He knows exactly how to teach me a lesson.

And not only do I learn something new I am also just in awe of Him.  How He cares enough for me to reveal things like this in my life.

Sometimes life lessons are hard...they can embarrass...they can hurt.

But how thankful I am to have a God who loves me so much that He cares about what kind of person I am, what kind of wife I am, what kind of mother I am.

He cares enough to get through to me exactly as my unique personality requires.

He knows how to teach like no other, how to make it absorb.

Proverbs 29:11
NIVA fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
NLTFools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.
ESVA fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.

Keep me quiet Lord and help me not to vent my anger.  Help me to remember that my mouth speaks loudly what is deep in my heart.  Give me a pure heart today.

1 comment:

Meg said...

Thank you for this Em! This happens to me more times than I would like to admit. Often times it ends with me in tears as i pray and plead with God to protect my children's hearts. And yet God makes beauty from ashes and can use our mistakes for His glory! Thank you for this reminder today!! Be blessed beauty!!