I Am "THAT" Mom

So I am THAT mom...

Ayla lost her second tooth the other day and was so very excited.  With her two front bottom teeth missing, she smiled big at me after I picked her up from day camp.  She shared, in detail (oh my goodness it took a few minutes), exactly how it happened in the Meijer bathroom with her cousin directing her to "twist, twist, twist" until the tiny tooth made it's way from her gums to her hands...yes I know, it all seems very unsanitary, the whole thing, but I have to put that out of my mind so that my blood pressure remains normal.

So anyhoo...she brings the cherished ivory prize home in a dixie cup.  I put it in the cup holder of my sweet white-mini-van-that-sucks-all-of-the-cool-right-out-of-me and drove us home.  And the prized-possession stays there overnight because, oops, I forgot!  We forgot, all of us!  And that was Friday.  Ayla didn't seem to mind or remember that night or Saturday night either, when she spent the night at Gaga's (can you blame her, she has a new pool?  With fountains!!).  So I don't recall what happened on Sunday but the tooth spent the night AGAIN in the dixie cup in the cupholder...

So yesterday, she remembers about her tooth and how she forgot to put it under her pillow and I panic as my heart starts racing because frankly I don't recall even seeing it in our two month old van that was spic and span for like a minute or two after I vowed to keep it perfect, and totally fell off of that band wagon...But thank our Father in Heaven, it was there!  We retrieve the dixie cup and Ayla finds her special tooth pillow and tucks it tight under hers and goes to sleep without a fight and dreaming of tooth fairy dust...

Mind you, Joe and I took up walking/running in the mornings before the kids wake up, like two whole days in a row...So, in my defense, all that was on my mind was the 6:30 am alarm as I climbed up the stairs Monday night.  And this morning, as we tip-toed around tying our shoes and setting our playlists...Ayla (who has been sleeping in until at least 9 am the WHOLE summer) whimpers in a very tired and confused morning voice,

"She didn't come, my tooth is still here!"

And my heart sinks as my stomach ties into an ugly bow...

I forgot!  I totally and completely felt like I ruined her childhood, right then and there!  Now I must admit that the tooth fairy has forgotten Jonah and Micah, on more than one occasion as well and I felt really horrible but they are so easy to divert and fool.  And the drama, oh the DRAMA, is just not nearly as noticeable with those boys, ever!  But Ayla, on the other hand, NEVER misses a beat and has the memory of an elephant.  I tried to explain that the tooth fairy may have forgotten because we didn't leave out the tooth on the first official night of the loss...

And she cried, and cried... She said the tooth fairy forgot her and was never coming back.

Oh the guilt.  I am THAT mom...

So tonight we left a big sign on her door.  She asked for tooth fairy dust (thank you cousin Janie for telling her all about the tooth fairy dust that you experienced after losing a tooth).

And tonight the tooth fairy will make an appearance.  Her and her "Bare Escentuals: Gold Mineral Veil" will have to do...

Ayla after her first tooth loss

Smile and Nod

I am sitting on my back porch watching the lightening show in the sky.  The rain pours and pounces, changing directions swiftly and fiercely making it's mark.  I feel like a child again as each one of my three...'not-so-littles'...make their way to me.  Concern and anguish grace each face as bright light flashes across the sky.  Hands and arms reach over to me grasping for comfort and reassurance.  My 12 year old is worried mostly about the beating his new bike in the driveway may be taking but the younger two are afraid that they may be struck and hurt.  I try to explain and cradle them each in my embrace for this cherished moment that they actually want and need me in.  And even though the thunder roars I have to be the rock...the grown mama... and I can't let on that the storm scares the living daylights out of me as well.  It may not be my bike in the driveway but my umbrella and patio furniture are out back and my house could blow down and crush us all with these unseasonable winds in an instant flat...But no, I just smile and hold tight and tell them that everything will be fine.  

Lately this has been my motto....Just like the little penguins from the movie "Madagascar" 

...'Just smile and nod boys, smile and nod'

Because isn't that what we end up doing so much of the time as parents?  When the waters are raging and the storms are beating...We have to hold it altogether and pretend like "it's all good"...

We have to be strong for them when the thunderstorms of life pounce on us and beat us down.  When the ones closest to us are sick and hurting...when we don't have the answers to the hard questions...when their little hearts have been beat up and broken and ours are bleeding even more for the pain they are going through.

We long to protect them from any extra anxiety or fear.  So we take it on ourselves.  

But so much of the time those burdens that we carry to protect can be too heavy to hold.  

And as the lightening strikes and the thunder rolls, I am reminded that I have a Father in heaven who loves my 'not-so-little ones' even more than I do...

Will you join me tonight in handing over your burdens that you are carrying, as I do mine. to the Creator of this magnificent creation...

1 Peter 5:6-7
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

because he cares for you....

And because of that you and I can truly,

"smile and nod!"