You Have My Heart

Just yesterday he was bundled in my arms as I rocked and rocked him to fall asleep for that cherished two hour nap he took...

Just yesterday he was waving around light-sabers and saving the galaxy from evil emperors....

Just yesterday he was wobbling and falling and grabbing on the boards as he learned how to skate...

And now he reads himself to sleep with stories about Poseidon's son saving the planet....

And now he plays competitve hockey and only uses the boards to sneak in a hard check...

And today he left for 5th grade science camp away from this crazy stalker mom and all of her control for four days...

And this mama bear bit back the hot tears in the gym this morning...

As I handed over the health form and my precious firstborn into the care of mere aquaintances I  could have sworn my heart fell out and hit the hardwood floor...

And as he gave me a quick hug and pat on the back when no one was looking I saw a sparkle in those adorable blues that reassured me he was extremely eager and excited to experience this adventure.

I could also see that he was more worried about me missing him than him missing me.  My sweet boy...  

And as he stepped up onto the big yellow bus and turned around and waved at me I was almost sure that I would explode into a million pieces because of the love overwhelming up inside of me...

Sometimes it takes the worried what-ifs to bring us back to the reality of the goodness of the here and now...

How much I take it for granted when growing pains are shooting through and two heads are butting up against one another because they are so much alike...

As I watched him board I realized that my heart didn't fall out on the floor back in the school...it didn't burst into an explosion either...nor did it fall out into those tears that I swallowed...

Instead, my heart drove off on that school bus to Camp Michindoh early this morning with that beloved son of mine...

And I know he will hold on tight to it for me until he returns on Thursday....

Until then I will be praying hard and waiting desperately for his homecoming. 

I will be singing this song all week...check it out!!  (and the tears will be flowing hot and fast)